Elozonam Ogbolu, an actor and former Big Brother Naija contestant, has written and talked extensively about toxic masculinity and related fallacies.
Elozonam addressed the common belief that performing oral sex on women, cooking, and grocery shopping do not constitute masculinity in a recent episode of Ikhane Akhigbe's podcast, In The Company Of Men.
When it comes to their relationships with women, he urged males to be more accommodating and kind.
"It screams toxic masculinity," he added, referring to specific behaviours that males typically avoid. Giving a woman a head isn't considered manly by some men.
It's really strange. Serving a woman, doing things for her, or even just going grocery shopping for her are not considered manly acts by many very toxic men in Nigeria.
If your wife begs you to get her a tampon, for example, those men will probably think twice. Their reaction will be that it annoys them.
A sanitary pad would be a great gift for your mom or any woman you know. You seem incapable of putting your wife down.
Who says you can't make her a meal? Why are you unable to perform tasks that are traditionally associated with women, either in terms of gender or in the traditional African context? Despite your fears, engaging in these activities does not diminish your manhood.
According to Elozonam, some women actively promote toxic masculinity by their fantasies and acceptance of destructive relationships.
In his opinion, toxic masculinity is perpetuated by those of the opposing sex. It is possible to be a toxic man who learns all these attributes from his poisonous father and then unleashes his toxicity, dangerous materials, and other negative traits into the world.
When you're not poisonous, you'll encounter women who will never let you into their lives—that's just their fantasy.
Because it is normal for them, they can't tolerate you if you aren't harmful. They use it as a yardstick for your level of affection and concern for them.
It piques their interest. On the other hand, you're a guy who gets soaked the moment he encounters poisonous girls.
Some women go so far as to claim they will only date men who can physically dominate them. "The man doesn't love you if he doesn't beat you." is one of the things I've read on social media. Just how? What gives?"
Thanks for reading: Elozonam of BBNaija says, "Oral sex doesn't make you less of a man"